Where's the Beef? An Affordable, Easy Cheat for You!
- Bruce Coffman
- Feb 28, 2020
- 2 min read
Updated: Aug 22
UPDATE — August 21, 2026
Beef is suddenly back in the news. On August 21, 2026, the administration announced a temporary plan to allow up to 300,000 metric tons of additional ground-beef imports over 90 days in an effort to bring down prices. The countries and companies involved haven't been publicly identified, and the announcement has already drawn criticism from U.S. cattle producers. SOURCE: Trump to temporarily ease US beef tariffs, irking cattle producers — Reuters
Whatever happens with that deal, the immediate problem remains: beef is expensive.
Here's an alternative.
I'm too lazy to cook and too broke to buy quality ingredients to cook with. Plus, raw beef grosses me the fuck out and I simply won't fuck with it. So, I had the Blair Warner brilliant idea of cutting up beef jerky sticks and adding them to stuff to sneak in some protein on myself.
My research assistant, DuckDuckGo Search Assist, says yes, you can cut up beef jerky sticks and use them in cooking, such as adding them to soups, stews, or casseroles for extra flavor. Since jerky is already dried and seasoned, it may not need much additional cooking time.
So I've been validated by machine. Ah!
I got the idea from an online review of Costco's Kirkland Signature Grass-fed Beef Sticks because I love Costco and their Kirkland brand products. Do try the canned chunk white chicken breast. You're welcome.
What am I gonna do with my jerky sticks if and when I can ever afford them? So glad you asked!
Add cheap protein and flavor to things you already eat
Top salads with small slices. It'll be just like crumbled bacon! Not really, but poor people have to use our imaginations.
Add them to casseroles and other dishes that call for beef.
Add them to Ramen noodles for easy peasy beef noodles.
Use them as a beef stand-in
If you're making something where you want beef flavor but don't want to buy or handle raw beef, chopped beef sticks can give you some of that savory, seasoned-beef thing without requiring you to cook a package of beef from scratch.
Or, you know, eat the damn things
Eat them by themselves. Revolutionary!
Make up even more weird, random shit to do with them. Fuck it.
Pros
A convenient source of protein. The Kirkland beef sticks I linked list 10g of protein per stick.
A potentially cheaper way to add beef flavor without buying fresh beef.
Easy to store and use.
The Kirkland product I linked has 0g total sugar per serving.
Cons
Check the nutrition label rather than assuming all beef sticks are alike. The Kirkland product I linked is 100 calories and 10g of protein per stick, but beef sticks can also be fairly high in sodium and fat. Read the label for the specific product you're buying. And, obviously, I'm not a dietitian. I'm a guy who doesn't like touching raw beef.
Verdict? Get you some!
Yes, you can order the Kirkland beef sticks online from Costco. Stop saying you can't quit Walmart. STOP!
Explore more!
Comments