NEW CONTRIBUTOR SPOTLIGHT: Tynisa (Kalari) Walker I AM The 92% Yet I Still Struggle Over Nov 5th

By Tynisa (Kalari) Walker

By now the dust has seemingly settled, we have gotten through Thanksgiving, though honestly I was struggling to find what I was thankful for. This is not some pity for me, it is a mixture of dread, frustration and hopelessness I had hoped to never feel again. In 2015 when the crumb bum from NYC made his first bid, I actively spoke up against him. I left a job that had been my dream to pursue independent journalism. I wanted the country and world to understand the danger of letting someone like him into our white house. And in 2016 it felt all for naught. But I didn’t give up, I took it to live streaming, podcasts, and writing. Then when 2020 hit us with Covid, I calmed a bit, still did my weekly gripe about things but focused on what I wanted to do with my life in case the Rona got me. I threw myself into writing my first novel and did not look back.

We ignored the strategic plays of the GOP

By then we rid ourselves of the awful four years under the orange man, but the damage had been done. He and his crony McConnell allowed a stacking of courts. Which back then didn’t seem like it would have grave implications. Democrats were so busy celebrating electing President Biden that we ignored the strategy the GOP had laid out. It was why they could be so embolden by allowing the project 2025 manifesto to become mainstream. They knew, with the SCOTUS packed, appellate courts stacked with pro Theocratic justices, they just had to set back and hope that Americans became too influenced by mainstream media calling President Biden too old. That the misogyny and misogynoir of VP Harris would be enough to make apathy happen. And sadly, they were right. I am unsure who makes me more upset. The people who willingly voted for this evil to return, or the 116 million Americans who sat out. Either way we are in for some bad times and it has me frustrated and struggling.

I am still mourning the new sacrifice I must make

I had to give up on a lot of things this year, my husband and I were planning for a much desired second child. My son who is now a high school graduate gave me years of joy. When I met and married my best friend, I had always dreamed of having a child with him, though he pretty much helped me raise a son that is not biologically his. I had my second novel near finished, and threw myself into helping the Harris-Walz campaign. I was going through fertility treatments and everything to see this dream happen. And on November 5th, 2024, that dream had to end. As a Black woman who is forty-seven years old, I was already considered high risk. Even though I lost the weight needed and I have an amazing OB-GYN, the thought of being pregnant in a post 2025 America is far too risky as it is. I am still mourning this, and it hurts. We just bought our house last year, and now we are also considering leaving the US. Some think it's hyperbolic to feel this way, but when you know your rights as a woman, your ethnicity and how you vote makes you “an enemy” to this upcoming president… What else can you do?

So, I struggle, with anger, with fear, with disdain for those still trying to point fingers at everyone else. Who chooses to ignore the rampant ignorance, self-entitlement, and cruelty our country coddles. I decided to no longer do my weekly podcast on politics anymore. I will probably review things and keep my mind focused on an exit plan. As someone who understands economics and social justice we are in for rough times. And while some think its time to just resist, they must not be someone with functional ovaries in this country. We who were always second or even lower-class citizens must brace for the worst this hateful regime can bring. I pray we survive it this time, because many did not survive his first run.

Tynisa (Kalarigamerchic) is an independent writer and author of the novels Axiom, and Taara Destiny’s Chosen. @kalarigamerchic.bsky.social